Dear Fiancé

This is part of a story series that can be read in any order. Read on for the one and only letter I have written to my fiancé while he remains my fiancé.

You once apologized to me about me not getting to be your fiancée for very long. And I laughed at you because there was no apology needed. None. I didn’t mind at all that we’ll have had a 69-day engagement. I just want to marry you in a church on a sunny June day with my great-grandmother’s pearls and my grandfather’s picture tucked into my bouquet.

I get to marry you in two days, fiancé.

This isn’t how I envisioned it for a decade or more. For a long time, I dreamed of December. But then my dream changed. My dream became you.

Because you are the man I’ve been waiting for. The one who smiled at me from the beginning with something special in your eye. The one who rocked my world by asking me out three weeks to the day after we first met. The one who never blew up mad or laughed at me and didn’t mind that I laughed at first at your corny last name. ;)

The name you’ll give me in two days.

You are the man my parents have been praying for and were hoping would wait a while longer to find me. You are the man who didn’t mind it took me weeks to let you drive me anywhere. Oh, how the whole church smiled when we pulled out of the parking lot that Sunday afternoon, headed to lunch for the first time in the same truck. That same day, you told me you could see yourself marrying me. I forget, did I say it back? I thought it.

You will, in two days.

You know my nervous tic is to tug on my hair. You know when you ask me what’s wrong or what I’m thinking, that when I answer “Nothing,” it’s really not. You know what I look like with no make-up and my retainer in my mouth. You know when I slip up and still call you my boyfriend instead of my fiancé. You know I de-stress by cleaning, fall asleep easily on your shoulder, and think there’s no better date night than cheesecake + my dog in my lap + you beside me on the couch.

I get to give you forever in two days.

Thank you for being altogether amazing, patient, gentle, kind, strong, and wise. Thank you for knowing what’s what and lovingly leading me. Thank you for being my Prince Charming who rode up in a white Ford truck. Thank you for loving Christ more than you love me. Here’s to no more goodbyes, just good night.

You’re my favorite.